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Posted by Joe on Saturday, December 07, 2002 at 21:34:45 :
In Reply to: Spratster's making all sorts of sense, Joe. Sack up and take him on!(nt) posted by Wordsmith on Saturday, December 07, 2002 at 19:56:00 :
After reading Spratley’s poignant insights into my personality, I’ve engaged in some serious soul-searching, trying to determine the source of the bitterness that I so unjustly project onto the brilliant philosophical minds here at thecry. There are a lot of possible explanations. When I was a young, strapping lad in Naples, Italy, I used to follow my mom into the local market where she would throw rocks at the philosophers delivering speeches in the nearby park. I never forgot the expression of joy on her face when she caused a pompous windbag to cut short some blathering message about the “nature of the universe”. Sadly, my mother later died at the hands of a jealous, peripatetic Augustinian.
Perhaps my bitterness came later in life. I’m as serious as a head-on collision between two helicopters when I say that in college, I used to enjoy strolling merrily down the nearby beach. One day, as I happily pondered the joie de vivre while gazing at the ocean, a group of tough, black-clad philosophy majors approached and demanded my wallet. Although I temporarily held them off by convincing them that wallets as such are mere ideas without substance, they eventually wised up and made off with all the money I had saved to buy an engagement ring for the wonderful woman whom I loved with all my heart. She never spoke to me again. I identified one of my assailants but he was acquitted on a technicality. I later learned that he was arrested not long afterward for attacking a young co-ed from behind and demanding some “ol-time religion.”
All I know is here I am, one lone, courageous voice speaking out against the blathering idiocy that has come to dominate the internet.
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