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Existentialism
Woody Allen (1935)
Annie Hall (9)
I love the rain, It washes the memories off the sidewalk of life
(Play it agqain,Sam)
Woody Allen
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on line works at (the cry)
- annie hall
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You think you're God! (audio)

ANNIE
Nothing at all?

DOCTOR
No, I think I can get a lab man up here.

ALVY
(Grabbing the rest of the chicken
from the plate)
Oh, jesus. Can I have the salt, please?

ANNIE
What do you mean? Do you think he's-

DOCTOR
(Handing the salt to Alvy)
Yes, excuse me.
(To Annie)
Perhaps it would be even better if we
took him to the hospital for a day or two.

Alvy begins to eat.

ANNIE
Uh-huh ... Oh, hospital?

DOCTOR
Well, otherwise, there's no real way to
tell what's going on.

ALVY
(Making sounds, gasping)
This is not bad, actually.


EXT. BEVERLY HILLS STREET RESIDENTIAL AREA - DAY

Rob, Annie and Alvy in Rob's car pull into a long circular driveway as an
attendant walks over to the car. A sprawling house is seen to the right; a
couple moves toward the front door, and the driveway is crowded with other
parked cars. Loud music is heard.

ALVY
(Getting out of the car)
Hey, don't tell me we're gonna hafta
walk from the car to the house. Geez,
my feet haven't touched pavement since
I reached Los Angeles.


INT. HOUSE

A Hollywood Christmas party is in session, complete with music, milling people,
circulating waiters bolding out trays of drinks. It's all very casual. French
doors run the entire width of one wall; they are opened to the back lawn,
guests move from the room to outside and back in. It is crowded; bits of
conversation and clinking glasses can be heard. Two men, California-tanned,
stand by the French doors talking.

1ST MAN
Well, you take a meeting with him, I'll
take a meeting with you if you'll take
a meeting with Freddy.

2ND MAN
I took a meeting with Freddy. Freddy
took a meeting with Charlie. You take
a meeting with him.

1ST MAN
All the good meetings are taken.

CUT TO:


FULL GROUP SHOT

A man stands talking, people in groups behind him. Two born like gadgets are
attached to his shoulders; he's wearing a bizarre space costume.

3RD MAN
Right now it's only a notion, but I
think I can get money to make it into
a concept ... and later turn it into
an idea.

CUT TO:

Alvy and Rob stand near the French doors leading to the back lawn, eating and
drinking and watching the people walking in and out of the house.

ROB
You like this house, Max?

ALVY
M'hm.

ROB
I even brought a road map to get us to
the bathroom.

ALVY
Whee, you shoulda told me it was Tony
Lacey's party.

ROB
What difference does that make?

Alvy looks into the room, where Annie and Tony Lacey are having an animated
conversation.

ALVY
I think he has a little thing for Annie.

ROB
Oh, no, no, that's bullshit, Max. He
goes with that girl over there.

ALVY
Where?

Rob nods his head toward a tall woman dressed all in white conversing with a
group of people close-by.

ROB
The one with the V.P.L.

ALVY
V.P.L.?

ROB
Visible panty line. Max, she is gorgeous.

ALVY
Yeah, she's a ten, Max, and that's great
for you because you're -you're used to
twos, aren't you?

ROB
There are no twos, Max.

ALVY
Yeah, you're used to the kind with the-
with the shopping bags walking through
Central Park with the surgical masks
on muttering.

ROB
M'hm.

ALVY
And ... uh-

ROB
(Interrupting)
How do you like this couple, Max?

A couple moves over toward Rob and Alvy. The man's arm is around the woman;
they stand very close. In the background, Annie and Tony are still talking.

ROB
And I think they just came back from
Masters and Johnson.

ALVY
Yeah, intensive care ward.
(Watching the woman in white)
My God-hey, Max, I think she's ... I
think she's giving me the eye.

As Rob and Alvy observe the guests, the woman in white starts walking toward
them.

ROB
If she comes over here, Max, my brain
is going to turn into guacamole.

ALVY
I'll handle it. I'll handle it. Hi.

GIRL IN WHITE
You're Alvy Singer, right? Didn't
we meet at EST?

ALVY
(Reacting)
EST? No, no, I was never to est.

GIRL IN WHITE
Then how can you criticize it?

ALVY
Oh.

ROB
Oh, he-he didn't say anything.

ALVY
(Laughing)
No, no, I came out here to get some
shock therapy, but there was an energy
crisis, so I ... He's my-my food taster.
Have you two met?

ROB
(Shaking his head)
Hi. How do you do.

GIRL IN WHITE
Do you taste to see if the food's poisoned?

ALVY
Yeah, he's crazy.

The girl in white laughs.

ALVY
(Looking at Rob and the girl)
Hey, you guys are wearin' white. It must
be in the stars.

ROB
Yeah. Right.

ALVY
Uri Geller must be on the premises
someplace.

ROB
We're gonna operate together.

Rob and the girl walk of together as the camera moves in on Tony and Annie
standing by the buffet table.

TONY
We just need about six weeks, in about
six weeks we could cut a whole album.

ANNIE
I don't know, this is strange to me,
you know.

TONY
just ... that's all you need. You can
come and stay here.

ANNIE
Oh.

TONY
There's a whole wing in this house.

ANNIE
(Laughing)
Oh yeah, stay here? U-huh.

TONY
You can have it to use. Why-why are
you smiling?

ANNIE
(Laughing)
I don't know. I don't know.

She picks up an hors doeuvre.

CUT TO:


The two men still talking about meetings surrounded by other groups of people
milling about.

1ST MAN
Not only is he a great agent, but he
really gives good meetings.

2ND MAN
M'mm.

Tony, band in band with the girl in white, is leaving the party room with Alvy
and Annie to show them the rest of the house.

TONY
This is a great house, really. Everything.
Saunas, Jacuzzis, three tennis courts.
You know who the original owners were?
Nelson Eddy, then Legs Diamond. Then
you know who lived here?

ALVY
Trigger.

Annie and the girl in white laugh.

TONY
Charlie Chaplin.

ALVY
Hey.

TONY
Right before his un-American thing.

They stop in a den-like screening room. A man is slouched back on one of the
comfortable sofas that fill the room. It is much quieter in here; a contrast
to the noise and crowd downstairs.

ALVY
Yeah, this place is great.

ANNIE
Yeah.

TONY
Uh, you guys are still-uh, you're still
New Yorkers.

ALVY
Yeah, I love it there.

ANNIE
(Laughing)
Yeah.

TONY
Well, I used to live there. I used to
live there for years. You know, but
it's gotten-it's so dirty now.

ANNIE
Yeah.

ALVY
I'm into garbage. It's my thing.

ANNIE
Boy, this is really a nice screening
room. It's really a nice room.

TONY
Oh, and there's another thing about New
York. See ... you-you wanna see a movie,
you have to stand in a long line.

ANNIE
Yeah.

TONY
It could be freezing, it could be raining.

ANNIE
Yeah.

TONY
And here, you just-

GIRL IN WHITE
We saw "Grand Illusion" here last night.

ALVY AND ANNIE
(In unison)
Oh, yeah?

MAN ON THE SOFA
(Looking over his shoulder at
the group)
That's a great film if you're high.
(The group laughs, looking down
at the man on the sofa. He looks
up at them, smiling, a joint in
his hand, and offers them a cigarette)
Hey, you.

TONY
(Shaking his head no)
Come and see our bedroom. We did a
fantastic lighting job. Okay?

ANNIE
Oh, good. Okay.

ALVY
I'm cool.

Tony and the girl in white leave the room, Annie and Alvy following.

ANNIE
(Taking Alvy's arm)
It's wonderful. I mean, you know they
just watch movies all day.

ALVY
Yeah, and gradually you get old and die.
You know it's important to make a little
effort once in a while.

ANNIE
Don't you think his girl friend's
beautiful?

ALVY
Yeah, she's got a great-lookin' fa- A
pat on the androgynous side. But it's...

They pass a man talking on the phone in the hallway.


MAN ON THE PHONE
Yeah, yeah. I forgot my mantra.

As they come down stairs the party is still in big gear. People are looser
now; conversations are more animated, some talk quietly in more intimate
corners, some couples are dancing. Alvy stands alone sipping a drink near the
huge Christmas tree. A tall woman, passing by, shakes his hand, then leaves.
He continues to sip his drink, alone, watching Tony and Annie in the center of
the room dancing.

The screen shows a plane in flight, Los Angeles far below, then:

CUT TO:


AIRPLANE. INT. AIRPLANE

Annie and Alvy sit, the stewardess behind them serving other passengers. Annie
stares out the window bolding a coffee cup; Alvy reads. Both are preoccupied,
thinking their own thoughts.

ANNIE'S VOICE-OVER
(To herself)
That was fun. I don't think California
is bad at all. It's a drag coming home.

ALVY'S VOICE-OVER
(To himself)
Lotta beautiful women. It was fun
to flirt.

ANNIE'S VOICE-OVER
(As she sips coffee)
I have to face facts. I-I adore Alvy,
but our relationship doesn't seem to
work anymore.

ALVY'S VOICE-OVER
(An open magazine lies in
his lap)
I'll have the usual trouble with Annie
in bed tonight. Whatta I need this?

ANNIE'S VOICE-OVER
If only I had the nerve to break up,
but it would really hurt him.

ALVY'S VOICE-OVER
If only I didn't feel guilty asking
Annie to move out. It'd probably
wreck her. But I should be honest.

He looks over at Annie.

ANNIE
(Looking back at Alvy)
Alvy, uh, let's face it. You know
something, don't think our relationship
is working.

ALVY
Tsch, I know. A relationship, I think,
is-is like a shark, you know? It has
to constantly move forward or it dies.
(He sighs)
And I think what we got on our hands
(Clearing his throat)
is a dead shark.


INT. ALVY'S LIVING ROOM-DAY

A lighted Christmas tree stands in the middle of boxes, books, and the general
disarray of packing and figuring out what belongs to whom as Alvy helps Annie
move out.

ALVY
(Holding up a book)
Whose "Catcher in the Rye" is this?

ANNIE
(Walking into the room with an
armload of books)
Well, let's see now ... If it has my
name on it, then I guess it's mine.

ALVY
(Reacting)
Oh, it sure has ... You know, you wrote
your name in all my books, 'cause you
knew this day was gonna come.

ANNIE
(Putting down the books and
flipping back her hair)
Well, uh, Alvy, you wanted to break up
just as much as I do.

ALVY
(Riffling through the books)
There's no-no question in my mind. I
think we're doing the mature thing,
without any doubt.

ANNIE
(Holding a framed picture and
moving about)
Now, look, all the books on death and
dying are yours and all the poetry books
are mine.

ALVY
(Looking down at a book)
This "Denial of Death". You remember this?

ANNIE
Oh-

ALVY
This is the first book that I got you.

Annie goes over to Alvy. They both look down at the book; the fireplace,
burning nicely, is behind them.

ANNIE
-God.

ALVY
Remember that day?

ANNIE
Right. Geez, I feel like there's a
great weight off my back. M'mmm.

ALVY
Thanks, honey.

ANNIE
(Patting Alvy's shoulder)
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I mean, you
know, no, no, no, I mean, I think it's
really important for us to explore new
relationships and stuff like that.

She walks away.

ALVY
There's no-there's no question about
that, 'cause we've given this ... uh,
uh, I think a more than fair shot,
you know?

He tosses the book into the carton.

ANNIE
(Off screen)
Yeah, my analyst thinks this move is
keen for me.

 

ALVY
(Off screen)
Yeah, and I-I tru- you know, I trust
her, because my-my analyst recommended
her.

ANNIE
(Walking in with another
armload of books)
Well, why should I put you through all
my moods and hang-ups anyway?

ALVY
Right. And you-and you know what the
beauty part is?

ANNIE
What?

ALVY
(Holding a small box of buttons)
We can always come back together again.
Because there's no-there's no problem.
'Cause ... Right.

ANNIE
(Overlapping)
Exactly, but ... exactly. Ooooh!

ALVY
You know, I-I-I don't think many couples
could handle this. You know, they could
just break up and remain friends.

ANNIE
(Taking a button from a box)
Hey, this one's mine, this button.
This one, you rem-

ALVY
(Interrupting)
Yeah.

ANNIE
I guess these are all yours. Impeach, uh,
Eisenhower ... Impeach Nixon ... Impeach
Lyndon Johnson ... Impeach Ronald Reagan.


EXT. NEW YORK CITY STREET-DAY

People milling about on the sidewalk as Alvy walks out of a store and moves
toward the foreground.

ALVY
(Into the camera, to the audience)
I miss Annie. I made a terrible
mistake.

A couple, walking down the street, stops as the man talks to Alvy.

MAN ON THE STREET
She's living in Los Angeles with
Tony Lacey.

ALVY
Oh, yeah? Well, if she is, then the
hell with her! If she likes that
lifestyle, let her live there! He's
a jerk, for one thing.

MAN ON THE STREET
He graduated Harvard.

ALVY
Yeah. He may- Listen, Harvard makes
mistakes too, you know. Kissinger
taught there.

The couple strolls away as an older woman walks up to Alvy while others walk by.

OLD WOMAN
Don't tell me you're jealous?

ALVY
Yeah, jealous. A little bit like Medea.
Lemme, lemme-can I show you something,
lady?
(He takes a small item from his
pocket to show the woman)
What I have here ... I found this in the
apartment. Black soap. She used to wash
her face eight hundred times a day with
black soap. Don't ask me why.

OLD WOMAN
Well, why don't you go out with other
women?

ALVY
Well, I-I tried, but it's, uh, you know,
it's very depressing.


RECENT FLASHBACK - INT. ALVY'S COUNTRY KITCHEN

Alvy's arms and legs fill the screen as he slowly gets up from the floor
bolding up a live lobster. He puts it on a grill tray.

ALVY
(Pointing to the lobster)
This always happens to me. Quick, g-go
get a broom.

His date, a girl wearing short shorts, leans against the sink and lights a
cigarette. She makes no move to help.

GIRL DATE
(Smoking)
What are you making such a big deal about?
(As she talks, the lobster drops
from the tray to the floor. Alvy
jumps away, then gingerly scrapes
the tray toward the lobster)
They're only lobsters. Look, you're a
grown man, you know how to pick up a
lobster.

ALVY
(Looking up in stooped-over
position)
I'm not myself since I stopped smoking.

GIRL DATE
(Still leaning against the sink,
her hand on her hip)
Oh, when'd you quit smoking?

He gets up of the floor with the lobster on the tray.

ALVY
Sixteen years ago.

GIRL DATE
(Puzzled)
Whatta you mean?

ALVY
(Mocking)
Mean?

GIRL DATE
You stopped smoking sixteen years ago,
is that what you said? Oh, I-I don't
understand. Are you joking, or what?

CUT TO:


A solitary Alvy walking along the FDR Drive where he had walked with Annie. -
The New York skyline is still in the background, the sea gulls go by, the fog
horn blows. He walks slowly, moving off screen.


INT. ALVY'S BEDROOM - DAY

Alvy sits on his bed talking on the phone.

ALVY
Listen, honey, Central Park's turning
green ... Yeah, I sa-I saw that lunatic
that we-where we used to see ... with
the, uh, uh, pinwheel hat and, you know,
and the roller skates? . . . Listen,
I-I want you to come back here ... Well,
I-I-then I'm gonna come out there and
getcha.

CUT TO:


An airborne plane.

CUT TO:

EXT. LOS ANGELES AIRPORT.

People milling about as Alvy, in the outside phone-booth center, talks.

ALVY
Whatta you mean, where am I? Where do-
where do you think I am? I'm-I'm out
... I'm at the Los Angeles Airport.
I flew in ...
(Sniffling)
Tsch, I-well, I flew in to see you ...
(Muttering)
Hey, listen, can we not debate this
on-on the telephone because I'm, you
know, I-I feel that I got a temperature
and I'm-I'm getting my-my chronic Los
Angeles nausea. I-I don't feel so good.

Alvy's conversation is still heard as the screen shows him behind the wheel of
a car on a busy street; he causes a near-accident by jerking the car too slowly
toward an intersection.

 


Ce qu'on fait n'est jamais compris mais seulement loué ou blâmé. Nietzsche, Gay Science

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