 |
Existentialism
Woody Allen (1935)
Annie Hall (8)
|
I love the rain, It washes the memories off the sidewalk
of life
(Play it agqain,Sam) |
INT.
APARTMENT
Annie and Alvy sit on the sofa. Annie's unwrapping a gift
while Alvy watches.
ANNIE
(Making sounds)
This is-
(Making sounds)
Huh?
She pulls out flimsy black lingerie from the box.
ALVY
Happy birthday.
ANNIE
What is this? Is this a...Present?
(Laughing)
Are you kidding?
ALVY
Yeah, hey, why don't yuh try it on?
ANNIE
Uh, yeah, uh ... t-t-this is more like
a present for you, yeah, but it's-
ALVY
Try it ... it'll add years to our
sex life.
ANNIE
(Looking up at Alvy and laughing)
Uh huh. Yeah. Forget it.
Alvy leans over and hands her another box as she puts down the lingerie.
ALVY
Here's a real present.
ANNIE
(Opening the gift)
What... huh?
ALVY
Check it out.
ANNIE
Oh, yeah? What is this, anyway?
(continuing)
Let me see. Okay, let's... oooh, God!
(She takes out a watch from the box)
Oh, you knew I wanted this ...
(Laughing)
God, it's terrific, God!
ALVY
(Making sounds)
Yeah, I know. Just-just put on the
watch, and-and ... that thing, and
we'll just ...
ANNIE
(Laughing)
Oh! My God!
(Making sounds)
Alvy kisses Annie.
INT. NIGHT CLUB.
Annie, spotlighted onstage, stands in front of the microphone, smiling. She
looks downward and sings "Seems Like Old Times. " The audience applauds
loudly as the music fades out.
ANNIE
(Laughing)
Thank you.
Alvy sits at the bar, clapping and staring at Annie as she walks over to him
and sits down. The low murmur of the night club is surrounding them.
ALVY
(Reacting)
You were-you were sensational. I mean,
I-you know, I-I told yuh that if yuh stuck
to it, you would be great, and-and, you
know, I-I-you-you were sensational.
ANNIE
(Looking at Alvy, smiling)
Yeah, well, we have the, I mean, they were
just a terrific audience, I mean, you know,
it makes it really easy for me, because I
can be ... huh?
Tony, a famous record personality, pushes through the crowd, moving toward
Alvy and Annie. An entourage follows him as he makes his way to their table.
TONY
Excuse me.
He shakes hands with Annie, smiling.
ANNIE
Oh.
TONY
Hi, I'm-I'm Tony Lacey.
ANNIE
Well, hi!
TONY
Uh, we just wanted to stop by and say
that we really enjoyed your sets.
ANNIE
(Laughing)
Oh, yeah, really, oh!
TONY
I though it was ... very musical, and I
liked it a lot.
ANNIE
Oh, neat ... oh, that's very nice,
gosh, thanks a lot.
TONY
Are you ... are you recording? Or do-
Are you with any label now?
ANNIE
(Laughing)
No, no, no, not at all.
TONY
Uh, well, I'd like to talk to you about
that sometime, if you get a chance.
Seated Alvy looks the other way, reacting.
ANNIE
Oh. What about?
TONY
... of possibly working together.
ANNIE
(Looking for the first time at Alvy)
Well, hey, that's, that's nice. Uh.
Oh, listen, this is, uh, Alvy Singer.
Do you know Alvy? Uh ... and ... uh ...
Tony Lacey.
TONY
No, I don't-I don't know, but I-I know
your work. I'm a big fan of yours.
Tony reaches over and shakes hands with Alvy. The nightclub crowd surrounds
them all with their low chatter and cigarette smoke.
ALVY
Thank you very much. It's a pleasure.
TONY
(Turning to introduce his entourage)
This is, uh, Shawn, and, uh ... Bob and
Petronia.
ANNIE
Hi.
ENTOURAGE
Hi.
ANNIE
(Laughing)
Hi, hi, Bob ...
TONY
Uh ... w-we're going back to the Pierre.
We're staying at the Pierre ... and we're
gonna meet Jack and Angelica, and have a
drink there, and ... if you'd like to come,
uh, we'd love to have you.
ANNIE
Yeah.
TONY
And we could just sit and talk ... nothing.
Uh, not a big deal, it's just relax, just
be very mellow.
Annie and Tony and his entourage turn to look at Alvy.
ALVY
(Fingers to his mouth, reacting)
Remember, we had that thing.
ANNIE
What thing?
ALVY
(Staring at Annie and clearing
his throat)
Don't you remember we-we-we discussed
that thing that we were-
ANNIE
(Overlapping)
Thing?
ALVY
(Overlapping)
-yes, we had, uh ...
ANNIE
(Looking at Alvy, reacting)
Oh, the thing! Oh, the thing ...
(Laughing)
... yeah ... yeah.
Annie turns, looks at Tony as he smiles and gestures with his hands.
TONY
Oh, well, I-if it's inconvenient, eh,
we can't do it now ... that's fine,
too. W-w-w-we'll do it another time.
ANNIE
Hey-
TONY
Maybe if you're on the Coast, we'll get
together and ... and we'll meet there.
He shakes hands with Annie.
ANNIE
(Reacting)
Oh.
TONY
It was a wonderful set.
ANNIE
Oh, gosh.
TONY
(Smiling)
I really enjoyed it.
(Looking at Alvy)
Nice to have metcha. Good night.
ENTOURAGE
Bye-bye.
ANNIE
Nice to see you ... bye. Yeah. Bye.
She turns and looks at Alvy.
ALVY
(Reacting)
What's ... you ... well, what's the
matter, You w-wanna go to that party?
ANNIE
(Looking down at her hands,
then up at Alvy)
I don't know, I thought it might be kind
of fun, you know what I mean, it'd be
nice to meet some new people.
ALVY
(Sighing)
I'm just not ... you know, I don't think
I could take a mellow eve- 'cause I-I
don't respond well to mellow, you know
what I mean, I-I have a tendency to ...
if I get too mellow, I-I ripen and then
rot. You know, and it's-it's not good
for my ...
(Making sounds)
ANNIE
All right, all right, you don't wanna go
to the party, so uh, whatta you wanna do?
INT. MOVIE THEATER.
The screen is projecting the beginning of "The Sorrow and the Pity":
a street
filled with fleeing cars, belongings tied on top and piled in the back seats.
Subtitles pop on:
"The Jewish warmongers and
Parisian plutocrats tried
to flee with their gold and jewels"
as a narrator explains in German.
CUT TO.
Split screen: Annie and her psychiatrist on the left; Alvy and his on the
right. Annie, talking, sits in a white molded chair, as does her doctor.
The office is very modern: stark, white and chrome. Alvy, talking to his
psychiatrist, lies on a deep leather sofa, the doctor seated away from him.
This office looks more like a well-worn den: bookcases overflowing, dark wood.
The dialogue is separated in each screen, though no one talks simultaneously.
ANNIE
(To her doctor)
That day in Brooklyn was the last day
I remember really having a great time.
ALVY
(To his doctor)
Well, we never have any laughs anymore,
is the problem.
ANNIE
Well, I've been moody and dissatisfied.
ALVY'S PSYCHIATRIST
How often do you sleep together?
ANNIE'S PSYCHIATRIST
Do you have sex often?
ALVY
Hardly ever. Maybe three times a week.
ANNIE
Constantly! I'd say three times a week.
Like the other night, Alvy wanted to have
sex.
ALVY
She would not sleep with me the other
night, you know, it's-
ANNIE
And ... I don't know ... I mean, six months
ago I-I woulda done it. I woulda done it,
just to please him.
ALVY
I mean ... I tried everything, you know,
I-I-I put on soft music and my-my red light
bulb, and ...
ANNIE
But the thing is-I mean, since our
discussions here, I feel I have a right
to my own feelings. I think you woulda
been happy because ... uh, uh, I really
asserted myself.
ALVY
The incredible thing about it is, I'm
paying for her analysis and she's making
progress and I'm getting screwed.
ANNIE
I don't know, though, I feel so guilty
because Alvy is paying for it, so, you
know, so I do feel guilty if I don't go
to bed with him. But if I do go to bed
with him, it's like I'm going against my
own feelings. I don't know I-I can't win.
ALVY
(Simultaneously, with Annie)
You know ... it's getting expensive
...my analyst ... for her analyst. She-
she's making progress and I'm not making
any progress. Her progress is defeating
my progress.
ANNIE
(Simultaneously, with Alvy)
Sometimes I think-sometimes I think I
should just live with a woman.
CUT TO:
INT. APARTMENT
Alvy and Annie sit close together on the sofa in some friends' apartment.
Their friends, another couple, stand behind the sofa in the background.
Excited, they talk almost all at once.
WOMAN FRIEND
Wow, I don't believe it ... you mean to
tell me you guys have never snorted coke?
ANNIE
Well, I always wanted to try, you know,
but, uh, Alvy, uh ... he's very down on it.
ALVY
Hey, don't put it on me. You kn- Wh-what
is it, I don't wanna put a wad of white
powder in my nose 'cause the-the nasal
membranes ...
They all start talking at once.
ANNIE
You never wanna try anything new, Alvy.
ALVY
(Counting on his fingers)
How can you say that? I mean,
(Making sounds)
who said I-I-I-I said that you, I and that
girl from your acting class should sleep
together in a threesome.
ANNIE
(Reacting)
That's sick!
ALVY
Yeah, I know it's sick, but it's new.
You know, you didn't say it couldn't be
sick.
Annie laughs, chatters.
WOMAN FRIEND
Just come on, Alvy.
(All four are now sitting on the
sofa. The male friend starts to
prepare lines of cocaine; Alvy
and Annie look at each other,
reacting)
Do your body a favor. Try it, come on.
ALVY
Oh, yeah?
ANNIE
Yeah. Come on. It'd be fun.
ALVY
(Moving forward on the couch)
Oh, I'm sure it's a lot of fun, 'cause
the Incas did it, you know, and-and
they-they-they were a million laughs.
ANNIE
(Laughing)
Alvy, come on, for your own experience.
I mean, you wanna write, why not?
MALE FRIEND
It's great stuff, Alvy. Friend of mine
just brought it in from California.
ANNIE
Oh, do you know something-I didn't tell
yuh, we're going to California next week.
GIRL
Oh, really?
ANNIE
Yeah ...
ALVY
... I'm thrilled. As you know, uh ...
uh, on my agent's advice I sold out,
and I'm gonna do an appearance on TV.
ANNIE
(Interrupting)
No, no, no that's not it at all. Alvy's
giving an award on television. Gee, he
talks like he's violating a moral issue
sitting here.
GIRL
You're kidding?
ALVY
It's so phony, and we have to leave New
York during Christmas week, which really
kills me.
MAN
(Interrupting)
Alvy, listen, while you're in California,
could you possibly score some coke for me?
Annie laughs.
ALVY
(Over Annie's laughter)
Sure, sure, I'll be glad to. I-I'll just
put it in a-a-a h-h-hollow heel that I
have in my boot, you know.
(Alvy picks up the small open
gold case of cocaine base the man
placed on the coffee table and
looks at it, reacting)
H-h-how much is this stuff?
MAN
It's about two thousand dollars an ounce.
ANNIE
God.
ALVY
Really? And what is the kick of it?
Because I never ...
He puts his finger into the drug, smells it and then sneezes. The powder
blows all over the room as the man, woman and Annie react silently.
CUT TO:
CALIFORNIA. BEVERLY HILLS STREET-DAY
It's a warm, beautiful day. Rob, Annie and Alvy in Rob's convertible are
moving past the spacious houses, the palm trees. The sunlight reflects off
the car. Annie, excited, is taking the whole place in. Background voices
sing Christmas carols.
VOICES
(Singing)
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
And a -Happy New Year.
ROB
(Over the singing)
I've never been so relaxed as I have
been since I moved out here, Max. I
want you to see my house. I live
right next to Hugh Hefner's house, Max.
He lets me use the Jacuzzi. And the
women, Max, they're like the women in
Playboy magazine, only they can move
their arms and legs.
ANNIE
(Laughing)
You know, I can't get over that this is
really Beverly Hills.
VOICES
(Singing)
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
And a Happy New Year.
ALVY
Yeah, the architecture is really consistent,
isn't it? French next to-
VOICES
(Singing over the dialogue)
Oh, Christmas ... tree,
Oh, Christmas tree,
How bright and green
Our ...
ALVY
-Spanish, next to Tudor, next to Japanese.
ANNIE
God, it's so clean out here.
ALVY
It's that they don't throw their garbage
away. They make it into television shows.
ROB
Aw, come on, Max, give us a break, will
yuh? It's Christmas.
Annie starts snapping pictures of the view.
ALVY
Can you believe this is Christmas here?
VOICES
(Singing)
Oh Christmas tree,
Oh Christmas tree ...
They pass a large house with spacious lawn. Sitting on the lawn is a Santa
Claus complete with sleigh and reindeer. Voices continue to sing Christmas
carols; Annie continues to take pictures.
ANNIE
You know, it was snowing-it was snowing
and really gray in New York yesterday.
ROB
No kidding?
ALVY
Right-well, Santa Claus will have
sunstroke.
ROB
Max, there's no crime, there's no mugging.
ALVY
There's no economic crime, you know,
but there's-there's ritual, religious-
cult murders, you know, there's wheat-
germ killers out here.
ROB
While you're out here, Max, I want you
to see some of my TV show. And we're
invited to a big Christmas party.
They continue driving, now in a less residential area, passing a hot-dog stand.
"Tail-Pup" concession; people mill about eating hot dogs.
VOICES
(Singing, louder now)
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas day
To save us all ... from Satan's power
As we were gone astray.
They pass a theater, the marquee announcing "House of Exorcism Messiah
of Evil.
Rated R. Starts at 7:15."
INT. TV CONTROL ROOM.
Several monitors line the wall in front of an elaborate console. Rob and Alvy,
along with Charlie, the technician, stand in the small room watching the
screens showing Rob as a television star on a situation comedy. They chatter,
analyzing the footage, over the sounds of the taped television comedy.
ALVY
(Overlapping the chatter)
Oh.
ROB
Look, now, Charlie, give me a big
laugh here.
ROB ON TV SCREEN
A limousine to the track breakdown?
ROB
(Watching)
A little bigger.
TV monitors go black as the technician turns of the monitors to fix the laugh
track.
ALVY
Do you realize how immoral this all is?
ROB
Max, I've got a hit series.
ALVY
Yeah, I know; but you're adding fake
laughs.
Technicians turn the monitors back on, showing Rob on the screen with another
character, Arnie.
ARNIE
Oh, I'm sorry.
ROB ON TV SCREEN
Arnie.
ARNIE
Yeah.
ROB
(Turning to the technician)
Give me a tremendous laugh here, Charlie.
ALVY
Look, uh ...
Loud laughter from the TV monitors.
ROB
(To Alvy)
We do the show live in front of an
audience.
ALVY
Great, but nobody laughs at it 'cause
your jokes aren't funny.
ROB
Yeah, well, that's why this machine
is dynamite.
ROB ON TV SCREEN
You better lie down. You've been in
the sun too long.
ROB
(To the technician)
Yeah ... uh, now give me a like a
medium-size chuckle here ... and
then a big hand.
The sounds of laughter and applause are heard from the TV.
ALVY
(Removing his glasses and
rubbing his face)
Is there booing on there?
The monitors show a woman on the screen.
WOMAN
We were just gonna fix you up with my
cousin Dolores.
ALVY
(Overlapping the TV)
Oh, Max, I don't feel well.
ROB
What's the matter?
ALVY
I don't know, I just got-I got very dizzy...
(Coughing)
I feel dizzy, Max.
ROB
Well, sit down.
ALVY
(Sitting down)
Oh, Jesus.
ROB
You all right?
ALVY
I don't know, I mean, I-
ROB
(Crouching before Alvy, looking
at him)
You wanna lie down?
ALVY
No, no-my, you know, my stomach felt
queasy all morning. I just started
getting ...
ROB
How about a ginger ale?
ALVY
Oh, Max ... no, I maybe I better lie
down.
INT. HOTEL ROOM.
Alvy lies in bed, one elbow propped up, a doctor sitting next to him looking
concerned. The doctor bolds out a plate of chicken; Alvy listlessly stares at
it. Annie, in the background, is on the phone.
ANNIE
(Talking into the phone)
Yes.
DOCTOR
(Holding out the food)
Why don't you just try to get a little
of this down? This is just plain chicken.
ALVY
(Taking a piece of chicken and
holding it)
Oh, oh, no, I can't-I can't eat this.
I'm nauseous.
(He gasps and makes sounds)
If you could-if you could just give me
something to get me through the next two
hours, you know I-I have to go out to
Burbank ... and give out an award on a
TV show.
ANNIE
(On the phone, overlapping the
doctor and Alvy)
Well ... H-h huh ... Oh, good ... Yes,
I'll tell him.
DOCTOR
Well, there's nothing wrong with you
actually, so far as I can tell. I mean,
you have no fever, no ... no symptoms
of anything serious. You haven't been
eating pork or shellfish.
Annie bangs up and moves over to Alvy.
ANNIE
(Sitting on the edge of the bed)
Excuse me. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Doctor.
Uh, Alvy-Alvy, that was the show. They
said everything is fine. They found a
replacement, so they're going to tape
without you.
ALVY
(Making sounds)
I'm nauseous.
(He sighs and gasps)
Oh, jesus, now I don't get to do the
TV show?
Reacting, Alvy puts up his band in disgust, then starts eating the piece of
chicken he has been holding. The doctor and Annie watch him, reacting.
ANNIE
Yeah. Listen, Doctor, I'm worried.
DOCTOR
Now, Mrs. Singer, I can't find anything --
ALVY
Christ!
Ce
qu'on fait n'est jamais compris mais seulement loué ou blâmé.
Nietzsche, Gay Science |
|
